Quantcast

The Long Arm of the Law

storytelling

Not throwing Jack under the bus here, because he is perfect in so many ways, but he inadvertently let the registration lapse on the babe-mobile. Which is a problem when you get pulled over and the police officer says, “License and registration,” and the registration you hand him has expired.

Woops.

“I’m giving you a ticket, but just send in a copy of the updated registration, and they’ll drop it.”

Cool. Well, not cool. I raged a little, because I have a pristine driving record, but we handled the registration and mailed it in promptly.

And then I received a letter in the mail regarding a court date. A court date? Weren’t they supposed to drop this?

momm

I swap out jeans for a skirt and smooth down my hair with the palms of my hands as I walk into the building. My watch sets off the metal detector, so he makes me walk through it again but “with your arms in the air like you just don’t care.”

I obliged but didn’t do my usual woooooo that comes after that line. There is no woooooo-ing in court.

“Excuse me, where do I go to contest a ticket?” I ask.

“That line.” He points to the line that I was hoping wasn’t the line. At least twenty people deep with a large sign that yelled at me, CRIMINAL MATTERS.

Criminal matters? Seems a little excessive. Could we dial it back a little, maybe?

I stand in line and hear general grumblings from the men in front of me and the men behind me. Of this taking too long, of us inevitably having to wait for them to go on a lunch break, so on and so forth. Yes, I’m the only non-man in line.

“And this girl here looking like she’s dressed for an interview,” mumbles a man about my age, in a leather jacket, and about five spots behind me. I look up at him and smile so very intently that he is forced to smile back.

It’s like a quiet face-off and I look like I’m hoping to kill Batman.

Battle won. You love me now.

I get pretty keyed up about wasting time, so I sit on the bench and scratch down some notes for a meeting later. Finally, the gentleman in front of me is called in; I pack up my stuff and wait to be called.

“Next!”

I give him (him being … well, I actually don’t know his title) my name, and he pulls up a piece of paper.

“Did you get your car registered, Ms. Ciambriello?” (He says it properly, by the way, with a ch sound.)

“I did, and I have documentation for you.”

“Alright, let’s see it.”

Jack is the chaperone on a field trip, so he had to take the babe-mobile, and I took the truck. I pull out my laptop to show him documentation.

“Whoa, whoa whoa. She’s coming in here pulling out a MacBook Air?” an attorney (according to his ID) shouts from nearby.

“You have it all on your computer?”  he says, incredulously.

“I’m sort of a millennial. I don’t have a photocopier at home, do you?”

“Hmm. No, I don’t.”

“That sounded a little fresh. Is she getting fresh with you?” same attorney from somewhere behind me challenges.

“Sort of a millennial?”

“Yeah, I think I’m on the cusp.” I start scrolling through documents.

“Registration.”

“Ohhhhh!” he says, like I’m on The Price is Right.

“Receipt.”

“Ohhhhh!” Seriously, I’m practically showing him a hovercraft.

“Insurance.”

“Ohhhhh!”

I shut my laptop and put it back in my bag.

“You’re free to go. And you win best presentation of the day.”

I walk away from the CRIMINAL MATTERS line with my record unsullied.

mom-2

I think this might be one of those situations where she thinks “lol” stands for “lots of love.”

Previous Post Next Post

26 Comments

  • Reply Tiffany May 6, 2015 at 3:17 pm

    Just out of curiousity, how else do people pronounce your name?

    Wooooooo woo to getting out of your ticket!

    • Reply Roo May 6, 2015 at 6:05 pm

      Sam, Kam, Si-am, etc, when it’s Cham. It can be Chambreeyellow or simply Chambrello. I use the two interchangeably and maybe I should have just kept my maiden name, haha! ;)

  • Reply Aya May 6, 2015 at 3:21 pm

    Hilarious story! I can totally picture this. You blinded them with science :)
    My husband is trying to get into law school now. I will let him know there is no woooo-ing in court :)
    Missed your awesome stories!!!

    • Reply Roo May 6, 2015 at 6:05 pm

      Maybe he’ll change the landscape of courtrooms and wooooo-ing will not only be acceptable, but encouraged.

      And thanks! :)

  • Reply Rachel Starr May 6, 2015 at 3:41 pm

    I’m eye-rolling *SO* hard at the dude in line AND the “attorney”. Ugh.

    • Reply Roo May 6, 2015 at 6:06 pm

      Hahaha it was totally a burn from the guy in line, which is why I engaged in a smiley staring contest. In other news, he probably thinks I’m a sociopath.

  • Reply tara e May 6, 2015 at 3:49 pm

    I’ve loved the whole app storyline, but it is fun to see some old school Roo stories thrown in :)

    My 79 year old Nana had facebook and used it to look at pics of my daughter (her great granddaughter) and would always comment “she’s so cute/she’s just precious LOL” on things that weren’t funny. It took awhile for it to click that she wasn’t actually laughing out loud and just sending lots of love!

    • Reply Roo May 6, 2015 at 6:15 pm

      Hahahaha, I saw one online that was like. “Honey, your Auntie Rose died, LOL.”

  • Reply MissCaron May 6, 2015 at 3:51 pm

    You go girl!

    • Reply MissCaron May 6, 2015 at 3:52 pm

      So unfortunately that phrase totally shows my non-millennial status… damn

      • Reply Roo May 6, 2015 at 6:15 pm

        HI MOM!

        (Just kidding.) xo

  • Reply Titania Jordan May 6, 2015 at 4:15 pm

    LOL. lolololololllllllll. And lol.

    • Reply Roo May 6, 2015 at 6:16 pm

      lol back ♥

  • Reply Erma May 6, 2015 at 4:48 pm

    BOOM goes the dynamite.

    • Reply Roo May 6, 2015 at 6:16 pm

      If only I didn’t have to waste an hour in a courtroom, booooooooo.

      • Reply Erma May 7, 2015 at 1:46 pm

        Yeahhhhhh, that part gets a serious thumbs down.

  • Reply Jennifer May 6, 2015 at 6:03 pm

    Yeah girl! I had to contest a parking ticket recently but was on vacation when the court date was set so I had to contest it in writing. Ugh. But I got the ticket reduced since their parking signage wasn’t consistent on rules. The parking spot said I was fine, while a nearby sign had been updated to be more strict. ***PSA*** Follow the strictest sign.

    • Reply Roo May 6, 2015 at 6:45 pm

      Oh lame! Thanks for the PSA, Jennifer. ;)

  • Reply Cheri @ Overactive Blogger May 6, 2015 at 10:12 pm

    That is the BEST relation of a ticket story I have ever ever heard!

    • Reply Roo May 7, 2015 at 1:59 pm

      Hahahaha, thank you, Cheri!

  • Reply Chococat May 7, 2015 at 5:16 pm

    I feel like that one attorney in the back saying “Whoa, whoa whoa,” is just there for background comic relief.

    • Reply Roo May 9, 2015 at 9:39 am

      Seriously, if he hadn’t actually been a real person, I probably could’ve written him into the story anyway.

  • Reply eRin @ Growing Up Senge May 8, 2015 at 12:45 am

    Get it, girl.

    • Reply Roo May 9, 2015 at 9:39 am

      ;) ;) ;)

  • Reply Meghan N May 12, 2015 at 11:24 am

    I once got a ticket for a headlight being out, and like you, If I got it fixed and mailed the proof the ticket would be dropped. Unfortunately the cop put an incorrect mailing address on the ticket so the letter was “return to sender”. Then i had to call the cop, but since he wasn’t there I left a message. He called me back at 11pm. I’m really good at talking in my sleep so I managed to answer my phone and had a whole conversation with him- but the next morning it was more like a vague dream. I had to call the cop back again to get the info again. The whole mess was too comical to make up but in the end it did get dropped :)

  • Reply Bonnie May 24, 2015 at 9:05 am

    I keep meaning to comment–read this when you first posted, about a week before I myself had to go to court for the same reason! It made me laugh and feel so much better about letting my registration lapse–oh you mean other adults forget to update their registration? It also made me feel better that I would make it through court just fine. They dropped all matters for me, too, thankfully. Thanks for posting!

  • Leave a Reply